Why my brother Noah (and I) like Joe Biden

Opie + Ritchie

Hi all. Sorry for the quietude. I've been busy here in NYC, signing books and hanging out with friends and having an all-around great time. I'll deliver the specifics soon, but in the meantime, please enjoy this amusing short from Ron Howard:

See more Ron Howard videos at Funny or Die

Welcome to 1932

So happy am I

Why?

Well...

1. I am in New York City.

But also...

2. I spent the day with my friends Jordan and Deric, whom I have not seen in way too long, and had a blast, and then we went into the city for my 7pm reading/signing at Partners & Crime (which is a wonderful bookstore on Greenwich Avenue). I knew that my close friend Amber wasn't going to be there due to illness (her husband's) and that my girlfriend Meghan wasn't going to be there due to a prior engagement (in North Carolina) but I was still jazzed to see everyone I hoped would show up. And then the store manager gave me a little wrapped box and told me someone had left it for me and I opened the box and inside was a salt shaker in the shape of a king chess piece - which is a prop in my novel - and lo and behold, in walked Meghan with the queen chess piece in her hands. She had skipped out on the North Carolina trip for me. And my heart skipped a little bit too. =)

And shortly thereafter...

3. My college friends showed up for my reading. Everyone looked exactly the same, and old friendships renewed with tremendous ease. Right before my reading began, the second surprise of the evening showed up. It was my cousin Susie, who drove down from Westchester County with her family just to be there with me on this special night. My oh my.

But that's not all, because...

4. Meghan's parents showed up (and they couldn't have been sweeter). After the signing was through, her father suggested the four of us go out to dinner. The problem was that I had already told my friends from college - who had left to wander the Village while I finished up in the store - that we would meet up with them. But I also knew I couldn't say no to her parents. Not only would it have been uncouth but it also would have been, frankly, dumb. And I genuinely wanted to get to know them - as I'm sure they genuinely wanted to get to know me. So I asked Meghan to call our friends and she told me that they were cool with meeting up with us after dinner and I finished up at Partners & Crime and we all went out into the chilly October evening, heading north to a nice Italian place that Meghan's father suggested. The host led us to the back room - where all my friends were waiting for me, cups raised in a toast. Surprise! Not to mention the two posters on the wall of the back room, one of which was a contratulatory banner and the other of which was a gigantic poster of my novel.

I am writing this now from Meghan's lovely house in Ronkonkoma, where I will be staying for much of the week. I can't even begin to convey how overwhelmed with joy this night has left me. I can't even begin to thank everyone for their kindness and generosity and friendship. Sincerity is not my forte, but believe me please when I tell you that right now I am so, so, so happy.

And in today's news

Play went very well.

Still sick.

End of update.

Flu-tastic!

This past weekend was glorious. I was not feeling my best, but I was surrounded by excellent company and that made all the difference. Frivolity has its costs, though, and this morning I suspected I had a fever. I went to Walgreens to buy a thermometer (an oral thermometer, thank you very much) and my Walgreens thermometer confirmed my suspicions. I was a balmy 100.1 in the shade. Being right has rarely felt so icky.

I'd write more, but my head feels a bit like a tetherball. Tomorrow the play I'm directing, "Wanda's Visit," opens at the Dunwoody Gazebo. 2pm and 8pm. Be there if only to see if I'll faint during my introductory remarks.

More tomorrow

Sleep tonight.

What I learned on my trip to Atlanta

(A guest blog written by my girlfriend, Meghan McAsey, who flew down for my book launch)

• Did you know that a certain airline (which shall remain nameless) sees nothing wrong with cancelling a flight with no notice to the passenger before said passenger attempts to check her bag?
• Did you know that the same airline makes promises of refunds only to rescind them later, and then refuses to provide a supervisor's contact information on the grounds that "we don't give that out"?
• Did you know that one airline can predict apparent typhoons in the southeastern United States, while another (thank you, AirTran) sees only clear skies ahead?
• Did you know that the duration of your wait at the baggage carousel is in direct proportion to the difficulty of your trip (read:interminable)?
• Did you know that Atlanta cab drivers have never heard of GPS?
• Did you know that it is very difficult to relay Mapquest directions from a friend at home via cell phone to an irritated cabbie while he mumbles incessantly about incorrect directions?
• Did you know that a cab ride from Hartsfield-Jackson to the outskirts of Atlanta costs twice what a comparable ride in NYC would cost? And that they don't accept credit cards?
• And did you know that a beaming smile on the face of just the right person can make all of that seem to simply disapper?

My book got all launchy!

This is me forgetting the name of one of my favorite people. Book signings are hard on the brain.

Do you see the diminishing pile of books? 27 of the 30 were sold!

A Q&A was demanded, if only so I could be asked why I wrote about doo-doo.

Thank you to everyone who attended. It was a very special night.

Candidates as Simpsons characters

I found this online. Thought it was funny. Maybe you'll agree.

Happy Yom Kippur

Not that, you know, Yom Kippur is supposed to be a happy day...

And if you're celebrating Yom Kippur, you're not actually reading this on Yom Kippur, so...

Uh...

Hi.

My book has its own trailer

Next it'll want its own swimming pool, its own zip code, its own six-pack of beer...

Hat in hand

I won't know until Thanksgiving how many books I'm selling, so the only indicator I have right now is my rank on Amazon.com. On Amazon.com, the books are ranked from bestselling (#1) to worst-selling (#3,000,000 or so). My book has been fluxuating between 50,000 and 500,000 ever since September. According to my publisher, one of the factors that may be discouraging potential buyers is the lack of reviews (positive or otherwise) on my Amazon page.

Right now, there is one review.

So:

If you have read my book, please take five minutes and write an honest review of it on Amazon.com. It would make my publisher happy.

SNL strikes again

This is some really sharp satire:

Some good press

Check out this interview I did with award-winning thriller writer Sibylle Barrasso. Much fun had.

Insights into a Demagogue

In honor of tonight's Vice-Presidential debate, here is a missive by my friend Dave Nelson:

Okay, we've enjoyed making fun of Miz Palin, 'cause it's just so damn easy. But many are the warnings against underestimating her, and below are two articles worth reading all the way through before Thursday's debate.

It annoys me to hear "she's not dumb", because if Joe Biden ever spewed the kind of aphasic fragments Palin used on Couric, he'd be rushed to the hospital on the assumption his aneurisms had recurred. But dumb can talk to dumb, and make themself and other dumb people feel smart by repeating things that smart people have written down for them.

Central to these two articles are the things I find scariest about Possible-President Palin.

Her narrow, self-serving view of the world: which has led her to threaten war against (so far) Russia, Iran and Pakistan...and whoever the heck else doesn't think we're the awesomest!

• See: Palin loves the word "exceptional." She may be onto something in her batty way: the election is very much about American exceptionalism.

And her unstoppable popularity: the simple human-nature tendency of many, many people to cheer for the cute line she just said and forget the blank stare that preceded it.

• See:Palin's former aides say under the lipstick is a real pit bull. Going into Thursday's vice presidential debate, Sarah Palin's former aides and Alaskan political rivals recall the candidate's jab-with-a-smile skillfulness and warn not to underestimate her.

My turtle has reached his destination!